Baby James Kidson

When we found out i was pregnant we were so excited we had been trying a while. We made so many
plans & we had his room done by april. We were just too excited ,so we spent the next few mounths
filling his draws and finding toys that mached his room. Every thing was just so perfect.
All through june my ankles,hands and face were swelling, but was told i was fine and not to worry as
it`s because of the weather and this happens when your pregnant. They got bigger and bigger and on
2nd July i decided to phone the hospital. They told me to come in so i could be monitored .
Baby james was fine & kicking away. He really didn't think much to being monitored. On Friday 4th i
went to see my consultant because i had a bad back & broken cocsix. They were thinking of bringing
him early because of this and at that appointment they found a small trace of protien in my urine. I
also had a very slight constant headache so they thought with my swelling and other symptons they
would keep me in with suspected pre-eclampsia. When i got to the ward my blood pressure was high and
my urine still had a trace but baby james was fine.
As the day went on it all went back to normal and they said i could go home but come back twice a
week for check ups. Then on sun the 6th about 9pm i thought i was in the early stages of labour this
being my 1st so went to bed because it was not too bad and felt abit like period pains. I woke up at
4:15am with the worst pain and was being very sick.
We arrived at hospital at 5am and i was constantly in an awfull lot of pain. After checking for
Baby James` heartbeat they could not find one, so they rang for a doctor and bought in a scan
machine so we started to panic. The doctor did not say alot and he wanted to get a second opinion,
they then told us our baby had died and i screamed and told him he was lying and he had to keep
checking but he would'nt. They moved us to another room because they needed to do tests and i still
didn't belive them, so they got a consultant to do another scan to confirm it.
I still belived he would be fine i could still feel him moving ,but we now know it was just my
waters.
My mum and dad arrived to support me and my husband. I was in natural labour but there was no
pattern to the contractions, just constant pain. As the day progressed i got alot worse, i was very
poorly so they broke my waters and were expecting to see blood from an abruption but it was fine so
they still did not know why i was so poorly.
It was very strange, i still belived our baby was fine.
It was a long day lots of crying and fear how could we have our baby and not take him home. I
carried on deteriorating so they helped me along with my labour, Then the pain really was unbearable
they gave me an epidural and i had lost all my colour they started to worry.i was in and out of
consciousness and had 15 consultants,midwives and doctors who were trying to help.
By 7pm my blood pressure had dropped to 66/32 and they couldnt work out why. At 8pm baby James was
born asleep and taken out of the room to be cleaned up. Shortly after, the placenter came out
quickly followed by 4litres / 70% of my blood. At that point the consultants said that they now knew
why i had been so ill, i had had a concealed abruption. Very quickly i started to recover as they
gave me 4 blood transfusions and other fluids.
1 hour later a mid wife was stood in the middle of the room with our sleeping baby i was so scared
of my feelings. I held him and have never felt so proud in all my life hes just like his daddy so we
named him after him. We had a mixture of feelings, sad, happy & scared all at the same time. Later
on that night i took another short turn for the worse so they converted the room into a high
depenency unit just for us and had a midwife stay in the same room to make sure that my health didnt
take another turn for the worse. I had tubes and wires comming out of me so that they could closly
monitor me.
We slept with him in between us all night but didnt get more than 30mins sleep as we had the most
beautiful baby boy between us.
We had the hole next day with him and our famlies. In the morning we gave him a wash and changed his
clothes. Later on that day he had his blessing, got his foot and hand prints done and spent the best
time of my life with him.
We have over 300 photos of him (proud mummy and daddy) and saying good bye to him was the hardest
thing we have ever had to do but we couldn't keep him with us foever like we had longed to do.
Everything feels so wrong with out him and we miss him so much how could this happen. We will always
love our little prince and cherish the time we spent with him.